Yesterday was the culminating day in a witch hunt I was game in. Starting off with a conflict with one a couple of days ago and solved over the weekend. But the mob still worked up and ready to kill. After I listened to each of them blaming me to be the worst person to work with, apparently, I asked them straight, what they expected of me. Open and in person, each one of them. None had an answer, with the exception of one trainee. And no problem to change and please her in that particular field. In fact, since she is not my trainee, I never realised, she expected me to comment on or guide her progress. With the fucking rest, I am still undecided and somewhat clueless. What was that all about? Behind the not – forthcoming arguments? Is it the unclear organisational structure, that somehow gets everyone dissatisfied and I just happen to have become the focus because I am who I am, naming problems and what and who should be the solution/solver?
This puzzle will take me a while. I just managed to get halfway over my personal hurt, anger and frustration. With the help of a friend, destilled spirits and the quiet refuge given in what is becoming my second home, lately.
Rush, Witch Hunt